It's been quite a while since I blogged. Life is quite busy right now. Filled with caregiving, trying to keep up in my roles as mom and wife, taking care of those itty bitty babies......sometimes just feeling like I need God's help to do all I need to do! Do you ever feel that way? I'm sure all of us do. Sometimes though, I just feel the need to take a little quiet time to reflect on the goodness of my Creator; His love, mercy and compassion.

Today I am thankful for God's blessings in my life. I can never say enough of His love. Just the everyday opportunities, normal routines....those are the things that make me realize the beauty of life. God often teaches me lessons in the small, what may seem insignificant, events in my life. My son and I are working on a starter bag of friendship bread. Ever had one given to you? Someone bakes bread and has several "starter" bags to give away. The bags are mashed for days, ingredients added, then mashed several more days...until the final ingredients are added and a wonderful masterpiece is baked. Tomorrow we will do something besides "mash the bag". We get to add some flour, sugar and milk to the bag's starter ingredients!!! Then we'll mash for a few more days.....before finally, the starter will be done and we will get to bake and savor something wonderful!

I think life may be a bit like that starter bag of ingredients. Sometimes we don't even know what all the "bag" contains or even why all those ingredients are in there. Kind of like "life". Sometimes we're confused about life - where we're heading, why things happen the way they do, why people we love get sick, why suffering happens or why people can be so unkind. However, in life - there's also direction, blessings, healing and kindness. Sometimes all those things are mixed in together. Just like that bag is mashed for days, then finally some "fresh" ingredients, then more "mashing".....until finally the last ingredients and a masterpeice.......so is our lives. God allows an array of "ingredients" in our lives, He molds and makes us into what He chooses.....until we become His masterpiece. Each intricate detail of our life is ordained by the Master.

So as we add some fresh ingredients to our bag tomorrow, then "mash" for a few more days.......I'll look forward to the day we'll add all those ingredients that are recognizable, taste good and are so necessary for that treat we are looking so forward to - a nice loaf of amish friendship bread. And while this process is taking place - I'll let God remind me of how to patiently await what He has in store for me. I'll let Him remind me that there will be days of refreshing - when events will happen that make sense - things that I can see and recognize as His love. I'll also let Him remind me that even when I feel like I'm being "mashed", when things don't look as clear or understandable, when the "ingredients" of life don't make sense - I can rest assured that He is working all things for an eternal purpose in my life. That He is ordaining and adding and allowing those things in my life that will help shape me into the person He has created me to be.

Loved.....that's how I feel today. Being a Mom and a Wife makes me feel loved....and so extra blessed. Walking to my car after a long night of work.....I got that text from Mr. Wonderful that he sends so often - these cute little graphics of funny little people and some extra sweet words. That man knows just what to say and when to say it. Is that because we've been together longer than we haven't? Going on 21 years together.......guess we know each other pretty well by now.

My children....well they have a special way of making me feel loved...just by the way they say Mom, give me a hug, or just a "thumbs up" when I cook something they like. I have so many blessings in my life - they're too numerous to name. However, being a mom and a wife have to rank at the very top of the list. God blessed me with a wonderful husband and two awesome kids. They're growing up - but I get to be their Mom forever. That makes me feel blessed!

Have you ever felt so blessed you couldn't put it in words??

Today has been a day of God's blessings! We received the news today that my father-in-law's AML is in remission. His bone marrow results show NO leukemia. He is going home for a couple of weeks....then he will be off to Vanderbilt for a bone marrow transplant. Did I mention he has a sibling 100% match donor....statistically you have about a 25% chance of that happening. If you don't have a sibling donor....it is often impossible to find one. Also - he had already failed 2 rounds of chemo...there was a "last ditch effort" chemo given to try to bring about a remission. Not statistically very good chances. The doctors told him 4-6 weeks to live if it didn't happen. Today we are rejoicing because we know God has answered prayers. I don't know what the future holds....but I know the ONE who holds it. I know the ONE who is ABLE. I know the ONE who loves us more than we can imagine, the ONE who is no respector of persons, the ONE who says if you have faith as a mustard seed, the ONE who says you have not because you ask not....today we ask. We ask for a full miracle for someone we love! We believe God has begun to answer that prayer.

I was blessed to spend the day with my parents. Just an "ordinary" day to some....lunch out, a shopping trip to the Galleria, some hugs and kisses, a gift from my parents (they seem to think they must give me gifts - even though I am 40) and some sweet memories. However, to me - it was a blessing. A blessing I still have them both, a blessing they have their health, a blessing I have their love!

Mr. Awesome and I were blessed to pray together about some "life situations" and see God working in those situations. There is no greater blessing from God than the blessing of a Godly husband. To know that we can both pray together about a situation....asking God for HIS will and that the outcomes be what HIS plans would be for us....what a blessing!!

Then I got to thinking about life friends, family, acquaintances....how God has blessed me so much through the gift of other people. I posted a status update tonight about my father-in-law's bone marrow. The thumbs up "likes" and comments were wonderful reminders that people care and most of all that they are praying for him and for us. However, what blessed me so much was that I realized they were people from all walks of life. Some I've known a lifetime, some only a short time, some I have worked with at previous jobs, some are close friends, some are family members, some are church "family" and some I attended high school or college with. However, the blessing I saw in that was that God puts different people in our lives at different times and during different walks of life. Some come..some go....some stay. Some are there when we need them. Some pray for us from a distance. Some have given us good memories. Some have influenced our lives for good. Tonight - I realized what a blessing it is that God has surrounded me with so many of His people. And for each of them - I am grateful!

Blessings....tonight there are too many to name. Tonight.....I am just simply thankful!

It's an ordinary day. There are chores to be done, errands to be run, bills to be paid and a job to go to. However, I choose to see it as more than an ordinary day. Thinking about my father-in-law this morning, a cancer diagnosis, the fragility of life and how quickly time passes - I choose to make sure today is a special day. It is special because I have an opportunity to make a difference in someone's life today. It might be a smile, a glass of chocolate milk for my 16 year old, a hug for my daughter, a text to my husband that says "I love you", a visit to my neighbor, a call to my parents or any other random act of kindness. What matters is that I choose to make it a special day and that I realize I can make a difference in someone's life. I know others make a difference in my life for sure. I have some dear friends and family who make a difference by just being here for me. Their calls, messages, texts, cards.....here lately I've been so thankful for those friends and family - and their "random acts of kindness." They listen, they care and they love me - unconditionally. I am thankful for that. Lord, let me be that friend to someone else today. Help me to remember that each day is special - a unique day - an opportunity to share your love with someone else. Lord - be near to my friends and family today. I pray blessings on them and I thank you for their love. Lord - thank you for this day - for it shall never come again.

Funny thing....I automatically picked purple for my text color this morning. Then I realized I wanted to blog this morning about my father-in-law who has cancer. Purple is the color for cancer. Different types of cancer each have their own color....leukemia's is clear. However, purple represents all of those who are affected by this terrible disease. My father-in-law has AML which is acute myeloid or myelocytic leukemia. He is in the hospital right now...as I am writing this. My husband's mom called him this morning early - about 12:30 am to see if he could come and help with his care for a while. So of course, this morning my father-in-law is on my heart and in my prayers. Cancer is so devastating to those it affects and to their families. Having worked as a nurse in an oncology clinic for seveal years, I know this first hand. Independence, hopes, dreams, plans....they all seemed to be ripped away in a moment. Fear wants to take hold of the lives of those cancer affects. However, I know ONE who has conquered cancer. I know ONE who gives eternal life. I know ONE who brings healing. His name is Jesus. He has overcome the world....HE tells us do not be afraid. I love the following poem..by an unknown author. So beautiful and so true. I first saw it in the lab room where patients I used to care for came and got their blood drawn. I saw more than a person walk into that room and sit down in a chair to get their blood drawn. I saw fighters, conquerers, winners, people with joy and happiness, people with hope, mothers, fathers, wives, husbands, daughters, sons....I saw people who were survivors. I saw those who were cared for by a Savior who loves us so much he gave HIS life for us. I saw people with eternal souls that cancer had no power against. This morning....I am thankful for that.

WHAT CANCER CANNOT DO

Cancer is so limited
It cannot cripple love
It cannot shatter hope
It cannot corrode faith
It cannot destroy peace
It cannot kill friendship
It cannot suppress memories
It cannot silence courage
It cannot invade the soul
It cannot steal eternal life
It cannot conquer the spirit.

My wonderful family this past Christmas. That's Mr. Awesome, my 16 yr old high school sophomore and my 19 year old ....now college sophomore. She informed me last night that even though she just graduated in May from high school, she now has enough college credits that she is no longer a freshman. ; ) Christian is the family comedian....he brings lots of laughter to our family. Ashley is our "little bit." She may be little in size...but she has a heart of a giant. Mr. Awesome...well the name speaks for itself. Greg is just that - at least to me. Then of course - there's me in the picture. Mom and wife. What a great blessing to be a part of that picture!

Well....today I turned 40. So I decided to blog. = ) Is today supposed to be a big life chaging event? Am I supposed to feel different? Perhaps I feel a little wiser. I might feel a day older. However, the "BIG ONE" doesn't really seem any different than any other birthday. After working as an oncology nurse for several years - I can honestly say "Thank the Good LORD I made it!" Aging is inevitable for those who live - so today on this "BIG ONE" I am thankful for the gift of life and I am thankful to be forty! My kids gave me a birthday card with a baby on the front. It had one of those three dimensional gadgets glued to the front...a pacifier in it's mouth. When I opened it - the inside read "Life would suck without you Mom." What a great reminder of two teenagers' love for their Mom! No one can say "I love you" like a 16 and 19 year old. ; ) Mr. Awesome's card was inscripted with the words "when I look at you I see the most wonderful person in the world for me." Awww....I love that man. And I love my life. I even love being forty! Who would have thought?